Grace and peace, in Jesus’ name. Amen.

The Wounded Father — The Longing That Echoes in the Night

Christmas Eve is a night of lights and laughter, music and memories in the making. Yet beneath the glow, some carry a quiet ache. Hearts long for peace that feels just out of reach: peace with God, peace with family, peace within.

This night reminds us why Jesus came. The Father sent His Son because our wounds were deep, because families were broken, because our world sat in darkness.¹ It was into that darkness, a Child was born. The radiance of the Father’s love wrapped in swaddling cloths and lying in a manger.²

A Tale of Two Fathers — One with Wounds That Never Healed

I want to share two accounts recorded in the Bible. The first is a heartbreaking picture of a father, king David, whose relationship with his son Absalom was shattered beyond repair. Silence replaced reconciliation. Distance replaced affection. Years of unspoken hurt hardened into walls neither were able to cross.

It involved three of David’s children. Amnon, Absalom, and Tamar. David had a number of wives. Absalom and Tamar had the same mother. Amnon a different one. One day Amnon found himself far too preoccupied with Tamar. She was a beautiful woman. To keep it delicate he did far far more than think. What he did was evil. 

David, his father and the king, didn’t really do too much about it. Absalom, Tamar’s brother, was furious. He could not believe Amnon was going to go unpunished. Absalom let that fester for two years. Then he took Amnon out. Absalom fled to another country. David wanted to mend the relationship, but again he really didn’t do anything about it.

Three years later Absalom came back, but the king refused to see him. He allowed Absalom to go to his own house, but he could not see his father the king. Absalom again got angry. He began planning a rebellion to unseat his father David from the throne. That didn’t go well and Absalom had to flee again.

As he rode his famously long hair got caught in the branches of an oak tree. There David’s general killed him, against David’s command. David sobbed and wept bitterly. His own family was torn to shreds because of his own inaction. When Absalom died, David cried out from a depth of grief only a wounded father can know.

O my son Absalom…
if only I had died instead of you!³

A father’s lament. A son unreconciled. A wound that never healed. That is a family truly in a deep mess. It’s a sad account. No reconciliation. No peace. 

The world into which Jesus was born was full of wounds like that. The world still is. The manger shines brightest when we remember the shadows around it.

A Tale of Two Fathers — One Who Speaks Peace

Christmas gives us a very opposite picture. Not a broken father and son, but the perfect bond of the heavenly Father revealed in His newborn Son. On this holy night, the Father’s voice does not thunder from heaven. Instead, His heart speaks through a Child. A Child about whom He would proclaim:

This is My beloved Son in
whom I am well pleased.⁴

Long before the Jordan River, long before the dove descended, the Father delighted in His Son lying in a manger. The miracle of Christmas is this: The Father’s love for His Son is the very love He gives to you this very night.

I’ve been speaking to the men specifically over the last few weeks and I want to again tonight.  In that Babe of Bethlehem, the Father says to you:

• I believe in you.

• I am proud of you.

• I will always love you.

The manger is the Father’s peace made flesh for you.

The Child Who Breaks the Battle

The wounds a man carries don’t remove God’s calling to him. They reveal why Christ came. The Child in the manger is the One who will grow to wear the armor of God perfectly: truth, righteousness, justice, and salvation. He doesn’t bring the Word, His is the walking Word made flesh⁵ who will be wounded like us, by us, for us, to teach us how to be strong.⁶

He came to battle the things we can’t defeat:

• fear that steals peace

• sin that burdens the conscience

• temptation that weakens the will

• darkness that clouds the mind.

He came to fight for us before we could fight for Him, or lead the fight because of Him, or lead our families to know and believe in Him.

We look at this little Babe in a manger and He’s cute, cuddly, frail, and in need of protection. He doesn’t look like much. That’s why we too often see Jesus as kind of soft, good with lambs and children. It becomes too easy to forget why He came, and who He is.

Seeing Him like that we don’t respect Him the way we should. It would be weird to see Him as Baby-Battle -Jesus. Every man here started out fragile. It’s just important to remember who He is. We men tend to see the world through eyes of respect. We respect each other. We see traitors and cowards as something less, something small, maybe something to be despised. At best something to be coddled, taught, and protected.

I remember, it was about three years ago, I was walking my daughter down the sidewalk to school to third grade. She was holding my hand and as carefree as any little seven or eight year old girl should be. A man came riding down the road on a big hog, with black leather jacket, chains, black boots. He turned his head to look at me and my daughter, took his hand off the grip and gave me a thumbs up.

So men, what did he say? He said, “I respect you.” I gave him a wave. What did I say, “I respect you.” I don’t know who he was or if I’ll ever meet or see him again, but that “respect” feels good. That is how God wired us men to work, to feel, to act. That visceral thing you get in your gut at traitors and cowards exists because we see the world through respect. Men who don’t act like men just don’t sit well with us. We can be polite to them, but we don’t really respect them.

This coming year we’re going spend some time talking to men about Man-Jesus. We’re not going to forget the ladies. You are precious to God and to us. You are designed by God to help. If you tell a man he’s awesome he’ll fight to be what you tell him he is. 

We just need to remember Man-Jesus was not delicate. He showed up to be a man. He could do that because His Father did man-up. If yours didn’t, get around men who do. That’s what Zion is for. None of us here comes dressed for battle. None of us here have everything figured out. We just stand together, shoulder to shoulder, with respect.

The Quiet Strength of Forgiveness

Christmas isn’t really about cuteness. Christmas is about One entering this world to do battle. The world can look like a mess at times, and there are those moments when it looks to big to battle. Christmas is the Father in heaven saying to you, “You do not have to fix this on your own.” That Baby is going to grow up to be a man, and a good one. He came to respect you. He came to stand with you side by side and walk into that battle. And when the battle got the fieriest, He stepped forward and said, “I’ve got this one. You go take care of your family.”

David and Absalom never reconciled. Their story ended in heartbreak. Jesus came so yours would not. Jesus gives what we all need, the things David longed for:

• A fresh beginning.

• A restored relationship.

• A peace deeper than the past.

The Father sends His Son into the world to bring peace where otherwise we would have none. Jesus comes to bring hope where we feel empty, and light where shadows linger.

Conclusion — The Father Who Stands in Grace

On this silent and holy night, the Father comes near. His peace does not depend on your strength, your success, or your story. His peace, the missing piece, is missing no longer. He rests in a manger. The Child born of Mary will bear your wounds, carry your griefs, and rise to give you life. 

No weapon formed against you will stand.⁷ Because the Prince of Peace – the Father’s Peace – lies there before you.

Amen.

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NOTES

As We Gather

Tonight we gather in the deep quiet of Christmas Eve to see the Father’s love in the flesh. Into a world filled with broken families, unspoken pain, and battles we cannot win, the Father sends His Son, the Child in the manger, the Light in the darkness, the Warrior who fights for His people. This holy night reveals not only the birth of Jesus but the heart of the Father.

Prayer Before Service

Almighty God, to whom all hearts are open, all desires known, and from whom no secrets are hidden, cleanse the thoughts of our hearts by the power of Your Holy Spirit, that we may perfectly love You and worthily magnify Your holy Name; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

History:
This prayer dates to at least the 11th century and entered English-speaking worship through Thomas Cranmer, but its theological heart aligns fully with Lutheran piety. It prepares the congregation by acknowledging God as the One who knows every wound, every flaw, every longing, making it a fitting opening prayer for a sermon about the Father who sees and heals. On Christmas Eve, it invites worshipers to approach the manger with clean hearts and renewed hope.